Sometimes, love manifests itself in funny ways. We often think that we’re helping out but we only make things worse. Matter of fact, I fell victim days ago by giving my best friend “advice” instead of hope. What happened?

So, I’m launching my poetry collection titled “Kanyinsola” six days from today and I tried to get two poems out of them published on a few online spaces. They both got turned down. As a matter of fact, I got one rejection letter just last night. That’s why when he called me and told me about something that he’s been working to get and a new offer he’s looking into, I thought it wise to advise him.

I told him lower his expectations. Those weren’t the exact words but looking back, I realise that that’s what I had implied. He reminded me what he was going through and how much he was looking forward to having what he’s hoping for come to fruition. Yet in my foolishness I reminded him of what he already knows and decided to risk which is that there’s a 50/50 chance of getting rejected.

I could say, in my defense, that I was trying to say that if the worst happened it may not be, according to one of my rejection letters, “a reflection of your work.” But that wasn’t being helpful.

Returning from church yesterday, I saw a plant and thought how seemingly useless it was because it was neither good for food as far as I could tell nor good for beatification but I remembered that God gave a purpose to every person, object and event  That plant at least was helping with oxygen.

Every human being needs a sense of purpose — a reason to go on living, something to look forward to. That’s why no matter what you feel or face, the very worst is to be hopeless. Because with everything else, if you have hope, you have the will to go on but when you don’t, you consider your life useless.

We really should stop projecting our own fears on people, even though we think it’s out of love. History has proven that if your purpose in life, at that point in time wasn’t to achieve something, it doesn’t mean that another person can’t.

It also means that the fact that you didn’t get what you seek doesn’t make you less deserving. It may just be that your type of special isn’t the special that they need. So, no matter how bad things get, if you live long enough, things are bound to get better.

Until next time, I am Oloye Emeka saying, life na cruise, catch am.

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